Halloween Spookiness Special: Day One

There are a number of approaches used to influence people in public information films aimed at The Kids. You might take a sort of jokey, friendly approach (cf. "Charley Says", featuring special guest mewling by Kenny Everett), or you might prefer a personality-led tack (cf. Rolf inviting everyone down to the swimming pool with a jolly wave of his foot). The most interesting approach, even if it's the one most likely to give Richard bloody Bacon an excuse to pop up on a clip show to talk about it, is to try and scare the living bejeebus out of The Kids instead.

In the first part of an enthralling (disclaimer: may not be enthralling) two-part series, we're going to look at a PIF from each side of the Atlantic, and try and decide which effort is the most truly unsettling. Proper unsettling. Half-a-notch below Threads unsettling. Brr.

First up, a look at how youthful former colonials were terrified into talking care of their bicycles.



We first happened across this short film early one Sunday morning a few months ago, lurking in the darkest reaches of Sumo.tv's early morning schedule. As with much of Sumo's output, it's also available (in varying formats up to broadcast quality level) at archive.org, and it's genuinely something you need to watch at least once. For those who fancy dipping into it, it's also on YouTube.


Aaargh! Scary kids on bikes!

The plot? A group of children, all wearing inexplicably terrifying ape masks and curly tails, ride their bicycles to the park for a nice 1960s all-American picnic, with one unlucky child the designated carrier of everyone else's lunch bags. Of course, it's not just the sight of what would make a serviceable promo video for The Knife that's the alarming part. Heck, no.



As the film progresses to the sound of jaunty pre-ironic library music, the attention is focused on differing spooky ape-children. For example, first we hear about Rooty "Toot" Jasperson, who has the newest bike of all the monkeychums. Determined to cement his alpha male status, he races ahead of the pack. Voiceover Man states that he's a real "go getter", but notes that if you're so very determined to lead the pack, there are several things you don't have time for. Such as, those silly hand signals bicyclists must make when turning.


Aaargh! Aaargh!


Yes. Always make signals. (And aaargh!)

In order to rest his weary arms, he skips one signal as he turns left. Just one. And he is duly thudded into the tarmac by a car.


Try to not do this on your bike, kids.

Now, how best to convey the gravity of this situation to impressionable youngsters already in a permanent state of semi-panic over the twin threats of nuclear annihilation and international socialism? A comedy 'prang' sound effect, and a jaunty 'whoops' animation? Yes.


Oops.

As the camera focuses eerily on the picnic bag that its owner won't be needing any more, Voiceover Man pipes up. "At this point, Rooty "Toot" Jasperson left the party." Thanks, Voiceover Man.

The crew of chums are mostly picked off in a similar manner, their callous disregard for basic bicycle behavioural protocol seeing them dispatched in various manners, including but not limited to: being flattened by a steamroller; falling down an open manhole; or smashing their simian face into an oncoming vehicle. Each one followed by a quick shot of their picnic bag, a quip from Voiceover Man, a cut back to the remaining chums, and a return to the jaunty library music.

It carries on like this for some fifteen minutes, with only one child meeting his unfortunate end in a non-fatal manner, mainly because he'd had his bike nicked. At the end, only one solitary tyke makes it to the picnic spot, thanks to his dutiful adherence to the Bicycle Laws Of His United States. As such, instead of mourning his deceased pals, he scoffs all their picnics instead. Hey, there's a Red Menace out there, it wasn't a time for sentimentality.

Quite strangely, on the Sumo showings of the clip, after each mishap the action cuts to monochrome footage of a scary laughing clown - and not 'ironic' scary, proper actual scary, but in the clip we've downloaded from archive.org there's just blackness and no laughter. We're finding it strange, because we haven't noticed Sumo re-editing any of the other archive material they broadcast, and it's not as if One Got Fat needs any tinkering with - it's disturbing enough already. But anyway, the whole affair is one that we can scarcely believe was shown to small child-people in 60's America, but, as the testimonies on archive.org site confirm, it blimmin' well was. We give it a Scary PIF Rating of NINE OUT OF TEN.


Aaargh! Aaargh! Aaargh! Aaargh! Aaargh! Aaargh!

2 comments:

opop said...

情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 言情小說, 愛情小說, 色情A片, 情色論壇, 色情影片, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊美女, 視訊交友, ut聊天室, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, a片下載, av片, A漫, av dvd, av成人網, 聊天室, 成人論壇, 本土自拍, 自拍, A片, 愛情公寓, 情色, 舊情人, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 情色交友, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊, 情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 色情a片, 一夜情, 辣妹視訊, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊, 視訊美女, 美女視訊, 視訊交友, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, 情人視訊網, 影音視訊聊天室, 視訊交友90739, 成人影片, 成人交友,

免費A片, 本土自拍, AV女優, 美女視訊, 情色交友, 免費AV, 色情網站, 辣妹視訊, 美女交友, 色情影片, 成人影片, 成人網站, A片,H漫, 18成人, 成人圖片, 成人漫畫, 情色網, 日本A片, 免費A片下載, 性愛, 成人交友, 嘟嘟成人網, 成人電影, 成人, 成人貼圖, 成人小說, 成人文章, 成人圖片區, 免費成人影片, 成人遊戲, 微風成人, 愛情公寓, 情色, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 做愛, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 寄情築園小遊戲, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊,

uhfdf said...

做愛的漫畫圖片, 情色電影分享區, 做愛ㄉ影片, 丁字褲美女寫真, 色美眉, 自拍俱樂部首頁, 日本偷自拍圖片, 色情做愛影片, 情色貼圖區, 八國聯軍情色網, 免費線上a片, 淫蕩女孩自拍, 美國a片, 都都成人站, 色情自拍, 本土自拍照片, 熊貓貼圖區, 色情影片, 5278影片網, 脫星寫真圖片, 粉喵聊天室, 金瓶梅18, sex888影片分享區, 1007視訊, 雙贏論壇, 爆爆爽a片免費看, 天堂私服論壇, 情色電影下載, 成人短片, 麗的線上情色小遊戲, 情色動畫免費下載, 日本女優, 小說論壇, 777成人區, showlive影音聊天網, 聊天室尋夢園, 義大利女星寫真集, 韓國a片, 熟女人妻援交, 0204成人, 性感內衣模特兒, 影片, 情色卡通, 85cc免費影城85cc, 本土自拍照片, 成人漫畫區, 18禁, 情人節阿性,

aaaa片, 免費聊天, 咆哮小老鼠影片分享區, 金瓶梅影片, av女優王國, 78論壇, 女同聊天室, 熟女貼圖, 1069壞朋友論壇gay, 淫蕩少女總部, 日本情色派, 平水相逢, 黑澀會美眉無名, 網路小說免費看, 999東洋成人, 免費視訊聊天, 情色電影分享區, 9k躺伯虎聊天室, 傑克論壇, 日本女星杉本彩寫真, 自拍電影免費下載, a片論壇, 情色短片試看, 素人自拍寫真, 免費成人影音, 彩虹自拍, 小魔女貼影片, 自拍裸體寫真, 禿頭俱樂部, 環球av影音城, 學生色情聊天室, 視訊美女, 辣妹情色圖, 性感卡通美女圖片, 影音, 情色照片 做愛, hilive tv , 忘年之交聊天室, 制服美女, 性感辣妹, ut 女同聊天室, 淫蕩自拍, 處女貼圖貼片區, 聊天ukiss tw, 亞亞成人館, 777成人, 秋瓷炫裸體寫真, 淫蕩天使貼圖, 十八禁成人影音, 禁地論壇, 洪爺淫蕩自拍, 秘書自拍圖片,