Day three in the Big Brother Bungalow (IT IS NOT A HOUSE, IT IS A BUNGALOW AS IT ONLY HAS ONE FLOOR), and there's a new resident. His name is Zac, he is a male man with a man's penis and testicles, and he isn't a woman.
Okay, we haven't had time to watch any of this (or indeed, any telly at all apart from the England vs Brazil match earlier) since the bungalowmates entered the bungalow. Don't worry, we're not about to become the sort of tiresome bores who wander around shouting at everyone how they don't watch Big Brother, we've got each highlight show and tonight's live show nicely SkyPlussed up for when we're less horrendously busy, and will report our findings in due course.
Luckily, we don't need to have watched any television at all to quickly flip to Wikipedia, Betfair, Photoshop and Microsoft Excel, so stat-hungry BB fans won't miss out on the latest edition of
Before we drop numbers, a few points of interest. Well, we say 'interest'.
Okay, we haven't had time to watch any of this (or indeed, any telly at all apart from the England vs Brazil match earlier) since the bungalowmates entered the bungalow. Don't worry, we're not about to become the sort of tiresome bores who wander around shouting at everyone how they don't watch Big Brother, we've got each highlight show and tonight's live show nicely SkyPlussed up for when we're less horrendously busy, and will report our findings in due course.
Luckily, we don't need to have watched any television at all to quickly flip to Wikipedia, Betfair, Photoshop and Microsoft Excel, so stat-hungry BB fans won't miss out on the latest edition of
Before we drop numbers, a few points of interest. Well, we say 'interest'.
- We haven't watched Big Brother for a couple of days. Therefore it would be criminally negligent of us to allocate any bonus multiplier score/penalty for our current favourite and anti-favourite bungalowmates. A narrow escape for the squee twins, we're guessing.
- Zak has jumped into first place in the betting, mainly because blokes tend to win Big Brother. This is reflected in the results, as he wins the 10% bump that goes with it.
- Those editing the Wikipedia entry on BB07 are either taking a lot more care and research in their uncovering of everybody's past (or they're just taking everything in the red tops as gospel), as there's a shameful solitary [citation needed] between everyone (for Laura, as it happens). This is clearly unacceptable, and we encourage our readers to add as many stupid claims as possible to the entries for all the bungalowmates.
- We've switched to the 'clustered bar with a 3-D visual effect' setting for the graph, as it'll give us room for the dozens of new people sure to be added in the next few weeks. And because it'll mean less fannying about with Photoshop to stop it spilling into the right sidebar on the blog. And yes, that was worth mentioning.
So, with no further ado, here come the numbers:
So, Emily and Nicki are still in the lead, but Zac (are we supposed to be calling him 'Ziggy'? Oh well) has zoomed straight into the bronze medal position. As he's a former boy band member, we're expecting lots more tabloid 'revelations' about him (mainly sourced from his agent, we suspect), so he could be a shoo-in for the big prize. Erm, that's the BrokenTV's Coverage of Big Brother Expressed Purely Via The Medium Of Not Very Complicated And Quite Possibly Incorrect Mathematics Special Winner's Certificate, not whatever you get for winning Big Brother, which of course is 'being quite famous for about three months'.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE BROKENTV VIEWERS WHO DON'T LIKE BIG BROTHER? THEY'RE PEOPLE TOO!
Here you go. It's a test card. But wait, it's got Frank Sidebottom in it, and it's live action, and it's excellent.
So, Emily and Nicki are still in the lead, but Zac (are we supposed to be calling him 'Ziggy'? Oh well) has zoomed straight into the bronze medal position. As he's a former boy band member, we're expecting lots more tabloid 'revelations' about him (mainly sourced from his agent, we suspect), so he could be a shoo-in for the big prize. Erm, that's the BrokenTV's Coverage of Big Brother Expressed Purely Via The Medium Of Not Very Complicated And Quite Possibly Incorrect Mathematics Special Winner's Certificate, not whatever you get for winning Big Brother, which of course is 'being quite famous for about three months'.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE BROKENTV VIEWERS WHO DON'T LIKE BIG BROTHER? THEY'RE PEOPLE TOO!
Here you go. It's a test card. But wait, it's got Frank Sidebottom in it, and it's live action, and it's excellent.
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