Saturday, 12 April 2008

Not That There's Neccessarily Anything Wrong With Dumb

From Digital Spy:
BBC One bosses are considering developing a gameshow series dubbed "human Tetris". The show, called Hole In The Wall, was first made for Japanese television then watched around the world on the internet.

Contestants have to fit their bodies into differently-shaped holes in a wall as it moves towards them. BBC One has ordered a pilot of the show from distributor Fremantle and may take it on for Saturday primetime, according to Broadcast.
Here's a clip of the Taiwanese version. Or, (for the benefit of those fearful of being Rickrolled) here's how it works in pictures.

Contestant stands in the Play Area, and strikes what they hope will be the correct pose.

The target pose is unveiled.

The wall containing the cutout target pose is propelled towards the contestant. Or if you prefer, 'victim'.

As the Wall O'Doom rushes toward them, they must use their brain and limbs to stand in a perfect facsimile of the cut-out, so that the wall can pass around them. Be wary gentle contestant! There won't be a lot of 'wriggle space' in the cut out, and the required shape may not necessarily be physically possible to anyone who isn't Neo off of The Matrix.

If the hapless contestant fails to strike the right pose, the wall crashes into them with as little remorse as might reasonably be expected from a huge pink oblong constructed out of thick foam.

And into the water they go. YOU FAIL. We'll forgo a rant about it not really being anything like Tetris, as the wall doesn't mysteriously disappear when they succeed.

This, of course, is clearly magnificent. And no, that's not us being sarcastic as usual. Stupid television can be a wonderful thing. Hardly anyone took notice of the European Football Championships in the 1970s, because they'd had their fill of Europeans in shorts falling over dramatically from Jeux Sans Frontieres. Indoor League included televised shove ha'penny, and it was still popular enough to receive a DVD release last year. There's always room for stuff like this on our screens, as long as they're done well (and not, say, Balls Of Steel).

Problem is, television often spends too much trying to be 'cool'. See how BBC One endlessly promotes Hotel Babylon, which to our mind comes across a bit like your mum trying to get you to listen to a new rock band. Even when it comes to game shows, shiny chrome and glass sets seem to be of a higher priority than good old 'being fun'. The Nick Hancock helmed Duel is reasonably enjoyable (even if it does occasionally cause us to double take when we look at the listings, because we think for .a second they're going to show the classic Spielberg film), but we're saying it'd be twice as enjoyable if the poker chips were three feet in diameter and made of foam, and the answers to cover up were on the other side of a bouncy castle.

Sadly, too many television programmes spend too long trying to be Gran Turismo 5 Prologue, when they'd be much better trying to emulate Super Mario Galaxy. Or - hey! - Tetris.

2 .:

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