The BrokenTellies 2007: Part Three

Unexpectedly Interesting Wallpaper TV Of The YearSumo TV Being male, Sky Sports News usually acts as a sort of 'screen saver' for our TV set when we're at home but doing something else. Sometimes though, such as when there's an England match that Sky have got the broadcast rights...

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The BrokenTellies 2007: Part Two

Hey, a new template we're almost happy with! But anyway.Overseas Drama Series of the YearThe nominations:The Riches (Virgin 1)Featuring superb performances from Minnie Driver and Eddie Izzard (who has come a long way since chewing the furniture in Mystery Men), The Riches saw...

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Guest Setting Five: Rum, Humbug and Mind Numbing Tedium, But No Graphs

Hello, and a merry post-Christmas to you. We're hoping you got what you wanted. What did we get? Bored, drunk, loud, ill, a headache, an argument and then drunk again, in chronological order. Oh, and a sat nav. We counted at least three other people on our street wandering around...

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Merry Festivus, Everyone!

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The Broken Tellies 2007: Europe's Bloodiest Cockfights and America's Crashiest Car Crashes

Yes!It's time again for our annual festival of brickbats and bouquets. First up - the inaugural brickbat...MOST ANNOYING SPONSORSHIP BUMPER OF 2007Ah, programme sponsors. Those cheeky little advertising blighters. All but immune to the growing threat of the PVR menace, they...

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So Much For An Update A Day (Blame Xbox 360 SWOS)

We've seen the Christmas special of Extras already! Much like about 60% of people with the internet, so it's hardly worth crowing about, but it is quite interesting to see an HBO broadcast of the show. Splendidly, it seems like it'll be largely the same as the BBC showing, with...

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Guest Setting Four: Kylie in Space, “Tiny” Evan Davis, and Custard Jammy Dodgers

Right now, we're busy simultaneously (a) looking a bit disgruntled at Frank Lampard's fluky goal against Liverpool in the Carling Cup and Peter Crouch's consequent two-footed lunge that earned him a red card, (b) wondering why the images we've uploaded to our new webspace aren't...

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Guest Setting Three: Pip Schofield Does Adult Telly (And Lyle The Crocodile)

It's time to lay out another guest setting at the BrokenTV dinner table (which is actually our old Pot Black snooker table with a cloth chucked over it. But hush! We've told everyone the pockets are novelty cup holders, and we don't think they've twigged yet). This time round,...

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"You'd Better Cut..." "Cut."

Time for another look at a Christmas tape. What will we pick out of the official BrokenTV Christmas Tape Tombola tonight?Granada TV Christmas Tape: Date Unknown (to us, at least. Definitely before 1985, because if was after that it'd be a cert we'd see Fred Talbot up to something)...

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ParkyPower

Peter Kay is on Parkinson: The Final Chapter tonight, ostensibly to provide an interesting and entertaining guest for all the ladies and gentleman watching. But really, because he's got a cynical cash-in DVD with not actual new footage of him on sale.We've tried looking at Paddy Power's excellent 'novelty bets' page, in the hope of finding odds on...

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Guest Setting Two: Highlighter Pen or Big Biro Circles?

It's Friday, and that means it's time for BrokenTV to stay in (go out), make a nice cup of tea (spend £2.99 on three litres of Tramp Strength White Cider from Bargain Booze), and relax (sit on the wall outside the library to shout at girls). While we're doing that, here's Simon...

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Yule (B)Log XIII: Scha-ha-ha-denfreude

Being a bit of a gullible lot, we've spent much of 2007 frittering away our child benefit on ITV's 'Make Your Play', entering 'You Say, We Pay' at the very last minute (we thought that'd be the luckiest time to call) and trying to claim our winnings from the European Internet...

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Yule (B)Log XII: Breaking News

BBC One has got itself a Flickr account.We mention this mainly because we haven't got the time to do a worthwhile update today, and we found it by accident it was only created yesterday, so there's a chance this is a BrokenTV World Exclusive. It's not even on their press site...

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Yule (B)Log XI: Extra, Extra! Xmas TV Not As Good As It Was Shocker! In Other News: Shit Stinks! Extra!

MediaGuardian have revealed the SHOCK TRUTH that Christmas television isn't quite as good as it used to be, with 57% of people responding to their online poll that, hey, crazy concept, Morecambe and Wise were actually better than seeing the Brannings sitting down to their first Walford Christmas dinner (NOTE TO EDITORS: That's something to do with...

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Yule (B)Log X: Good News, Unrelated Thing

Love Soup is back over the Christmas period. A very welcome sight, but the show does seem to have ditched it's USP (the character played by Michael Landes) and been trimmed to half an hour. Still, more Renwick on our screens can never be a bad thing. Well, unless Mark Lawson...

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Yule (B)Log IX: With Apologies To Creamup

Well, the ITV1 Christmas schedules are out. And do you know what? They're making a bit more of an effort this time out. There's no cynical attempt to cash in on a popular BBC One comedy by chucking out a South Bank Show Special on the big day this time round.The following shows are flagged up as highlights on ITV's Press Centre. Which we've got access...

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Yule (B)Log VIII: Indiana Jones and the Pint Of Lager

Central TV Christmas Tape 1984 (YouTube link)It's time for the second of our looks back into the world of Christmas Tapes. Way back when, we looked at ATV's Bongotastic 1977 effort. Today finds us seven years into the future (erm, from then, not now, obv), where ATV has transmutated...

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Yule (B)Log VII: Guest Setting One

It's time for BrokenTV to put out the first of several guest settings to our pre-Christmastide jamboree. First to be seated is disc jockey and journalist Matthew Rudd, who has popped around to offer a recollection of telly Christmas past. While we rummage through our cutlery...

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Yule (B)Log VI: Meanwhile, in ITV's Plus Column

A mercifully brief update today, because we're off out to watch The Magic Numbers. While our thoughts on the current state of ITV1 were delivered pretty comprehensively just the other day, credit where it's due. While the proper ITV Christmas schedules haven't made Digiguide...

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Yule (B)Log V: The Telly Schedules Are Out

The proper ones, not the 'To Be Confirmed' saturated travesties that pop up in the tabloids at the end of November. And here are the links that'll help you decide whether it's worth investing in a bunch of DVDs to watch in the last week of this month:BBC OneBBC TwoBBC ThreeBBC FourAs ever, a bit of a mixed bag, and a selection that brings up a nagging...

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We'll Say It Again: Pain

Given our position of Britain's favourite telly blog that was once described as "gleefully acerbic" by the BBC website's pull-out culture section (if by "favourite" you mean "only", that is), you'd expect us to dance a little jig of joy every time ITV mess something up. But...

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BrokenTV's Telly Yule (B)Log: Day Four

Radio Times to Potential Customers: "There's Nothing On Next Week, Don't Bother Buying Me"The Radio Times. Circulation: 1,046,601 (ABC, Jan-Jun 07). Readership: 2,959,000 (NRS, Jan-Dec 06). Price: £1. Advertising rates: quite high.And this week's cover? "Erm... THE EPISODE OF...

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BrokenTV's Telly Yule (B)Log: Day Three

Sorry about yesterday's update, everyone. Just plonking a graph onto the site and expecting everyone to be entertained was a bit lacklustre, a bit like when Sky One advertise a new episode of The Simpsons, only for it to be a clip show.Luckily, we'll pulled out all the stops,...

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BrokenTV's Telly Yule (B)Log: Day Two

Onto the second day of our Christlemas Parade, and it's time to look at one of the traditional complaints about modern Christmas telly. "Eeh, it's not as good as it used to be. You used to get thirty million people watching Mike Yarwood, you know", is something uttered quite...

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