Kashing In On Kristmas

That's it. It is now officially Almost Christmas. How can we tell? Why, the annual Peter Kay DVD Featuring Absolutely No New Content Whatsoever is in the shops, that's why. If you hold the DVD case up to your ear really, really closely, you can almost hear the sound of distant...

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One Hit Wonderland*

*Apols to Tony Hawks, and to anyone annoyed by overuse of the word 'concept'. You'll see.As you may very well not be aware, aside from being an increasingly irregular contributor to BrokenTV (which is a bit of a shame, because he's the only one), BrokenTV's Mark X is also the...

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The Irony Is Almost Sickening

So. There's this really big rugby match we'd bought tickets for. Quite good tickets, too. Only for events to materialise that mean we won't be able to go to it.The tickets arrive, their arrival coinciding with our credit card bill reminding us just how much we'd paid for the...

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The Vidal versus The Dimblebum

Because the video in the version everyone seems to be linking to stutters badly on our computer. We really should change the site header back, shouldn't ...

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The Day The Laughter Might Die

A bit late with this, but Digital Spy reports, in a piece claiming Harry Hill is under consideration to present this year's Comedy Awards, "Graham Norton, Dara O'Briain, Piers Morgan, Al Murray and Jimmy Carr are also apparently in the running for the job." A quick note to...

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The World Is Now, At Least A Bit, Better

And he's getting a new puppy for his kids! Trendy new-meeja cynicism aside, this is a pretty huge thing right here. Four and a half years ago, we watched the DNC National Convention coverage around the time of John Kerry's presidential nomination speech, and noted commentators...

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Hope

Well, at least until it all turns out like it did with Tony Blair. But, until then: hurrah.Barack Obama now predicted to take 51% of the popular vote. We were wrong earlier, Jimmy Carter took 50.1% of the popular vote in 1976, but even JFK only took 49.7%. If it stays around...

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Fox News: Karl Rove Speaks and McCain Concedes

"America has had a black First Family for years. The 1980s had The Cosby Show."Because that's the same as electing an African-American to the White House for the first time in history.We know that's not Karl Rove. By the time our mobile phone camera focused, we missed him.But...

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CNN Declare Obama President of the USA

This is probably quite big news. There are certainly around a million people in Chicago getting quite excited about that on our television right now. Paddy Power have already stopped taking bets on it, so it's entirely fair to say they beat CNN to the punch.In all seriousness, even though it's messed up an update we'd half-written about something more...

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Breaking Non-News

The Democrats retain control of the Senate. What could this mean? Well, after the DNC captured seats held by retiring GOP senators in Virginia and New Mexico, they're sure to... erm... hey look everyone! It's a YouTube video that mentions Spiro Agnew!Betting Update: If you put a penny on McCain, and he won, you could buy Europe.(Two thousand BrokenTV...

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"You Brought A Spoon To A Spork Fight!"

The Live Daily Show/Colbert special on NOW, video streaming people/Americans who found this blog by mistake. That's where we're stealing all our jokes from for the next six hours.Betting update: Obama: 1-1000McCain: 80-1And how stingy does that 80-1 seem now?[update not worth a new post]BBC News reporting Obama with 50% of the popular vote, to McCain's...

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Important Confectionery Update

The Fox News crew are looking a little perplexed as it transpires Karl Rove has sent them each some specially made cookies, in the shape of "a widescreen, hi-def television broadcasting Fox News". See, even Karl Rove isn't all evil, in the same way the Margaret Thatcher helped invent butterscotch flavour Angel Delight.Fox News now reporting Obama on...

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Projections Update

Well, it's safe to say Obama is going to win, especially now ITV News are claiming he has won Ohio. It's time for a large scale round-up of the projections.All over the place, there. Hey, we haven't done any charts yet.Ph...

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The Worst News Of The Night

Jon Culshaw is on ITV News. He can do an impersonation of Barack Obama. Bollocks - the main reason we wanted Obama to win is that it might mean less of Jon Culshaw's inaccurate 'act' on our screens. Can we go back in time six months and rig the primaries so that Hillary wins...

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Over on Fox News

It's like the funeral of an especially beloved family pet. However, a bit of a discrepancy with the projections.ITV NewsMcCain 34, Obama 103BBC NewsMcCain 34, Obama 103Meanwhile, on the News International networks:Sky NewsMcCain 32, Obama 39Fox NewsObama 81, McCain 39All of...

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Over On Sky...

There's a little Street Fighter II-type icon in the lower right of the screen. Note the way the two portraits are leaning violently into each other, as if it's a boxing match.Oh Sky, can't you think about something other than sport for five minutes? They've just clumsily crashed...

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What Manner Of Devilry Is This?

Here's a screen grab we'd just taken after mistakenly assuming the Beeb had messed up and were projecting McCain to win the election. We then realised that the "Kentucky" didn't refer to where the current live footage was being shot - it being being transmitted from a plane,...

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Live Via Hologram!

CNN don't care what people think any more. Wolf Blitzer is currently talking to Jessica Yellin "Live via Hologram from Chicago".Yes. Instead of having a correspondent just appear on a 'screen', the CNN boffins have overlaid a three-dimensional representation of Jessica Yellin...

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Things Are Almost Happening Now

Well, that was a useful time for our internet connection to go down. It did give us an excuse to sneak a couple of hours of kip.Now we're awake, and it's time for the 'proper' coverage. While Dimbleby (D) is on BBC One proclaiming how a lot of people are claiming they know who...

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More Old Election Result Night Awards

MOST OUTRAGEOUSLY BEVELLED TIMECHECK CLOCKWinner: ABC News This Morning, 1984What exactly was behind the mad craze for chucking an outrageous bevel behind every bit of caption text on mid-80s US television? It looked garish, clumsy and all-round nasty. Just because you've found...

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Live Or Not Live From The Stump

LIVE UPDATE TICKER: We're watching the streaming MSNBC coverage now. John McCain has just welcomed his 96 year old mother up on stage. Wonder if Jon Stewart will be picking up on that. UPDATE UPDATE: He's just made the "Mac Is Back!" comment again, so this might be a repeat of yesterday's last minute rally. It's hard to tell, as there's no "LIVE"...

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LIVE US08 BLOG: Betting and Drinking

When you're staying up until the stupid hours watching coverage of the US Elections, you may well be peeking onto Fox News to see just how they're handling the fact the EVIL SOCIALISTS are very likely to sweep back into power and introduce things like SOCIALISED MEDICINE, HAND...

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LIVE US08 BLOG: And off we go

We've been tormented by the endless coverage for what seems like an entire year. Barely an hour's television viewing would pass without being reminded of the monumental battle between them. But as last, it seems we're nearing the sweet merciful release of a conclusion. Could...

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McCain-Ackroyd

We've just time for a quick update on this before our US Election Special knocks everything else off the front page. Last week saw a welcome return to form for Newstopia after a couple of slightly sub-par episodes (which were, in themselves, saved from the doldrums by at least...

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This Is For Uncle Sam!

One day to go, and we must admit it's a real pity we don't get to see the attack ads from each candidate running on our TV. After all, what about the hundreds of thousands of US citizens legally eligible to vote in the Presidential Election currently situated in the UK? Well worth a few low-cost slots on daytime Sky Sports News, surely?But anyway,...

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Cold Dead Eyes

This is, we believe, what is technically known as a 'teaser'.Aye, we know. Lazy. Obvious. Unfair. Possibly even misogynistic. But... those dead out of focus eyes! How could we not?(NOTE TO SELVES: Updating the blog on a Saturday night whilst on the wrong side of a couple of...

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